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No Regrets, right?

Last week, one of my coaches told me “you just need to believe you can pull it off.”  He was talking about a double leg but it applies to everything.  I’m my own biggest critic and probably harder on myself than anyone ever has been, but that’s not an invitation to test that.  I meter myself in situations I probably don’t need to because I’m not sure I can pull it off.

Leap back 5 years ago, as my marriage was falling apart and I had just finished my MBA.  I was absorbed in the only thing that mattered to me, getting ahead at work.  My mentor and dear friend told me a story over our usual weekly coffee date about when she realized work wasn’t everything.  I knew what she was trying to impart on me.  She must have seen it written all over.  But that’s one of those lessons you just have live through. I did.  And changed a lot about my life.  I left the company I was working for. Found a job and a boss that gave me a better balance.  Went all in with my life outside of work, training Krav Maga and working on my distance running.  And then I found something that really made me happy.  Krav and teaching it to others.  And I changed my balance even more.  I took a job that I knew was only going be 40 hours a week.  That I could leave at the end of the day, or the weekend and not think about it until I came back to my desk.  Despite nudging and offers to take on more, I stayed where I was at because I was never sure I could keep it in balance. 

And then I got an im today.  Something that had been casually tossed out there before but instead of a year out, it was today.  And it was kind of like a liver shot.  I relived every awful thing and it kind of made me want to yak.  And then I really thought about it.  I’m in a better place now.  I’ve grown up a bit.  I have things that I love and hold dearly to me outside of work.  I would also be working for an amazing boss that wouldn’t cannibalize you for his success.    

So I asked if I had to wear a suit, he said no but I did have to wear shoes outside my office.  Yes I have this thing against wearing shoes, despite having quite a collection.  Deal.  He asked if that was my deciding factor, I said no and explained the aforementioned.  I believe I can pull it off.                

 

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