Coach Kirstin

About 5 weeks ago I got an awful stomach bug.  Add that to being pretty lax with my diet and I had been thinking about doing a cleanse.  Then I visit NM and halfway through my visit, everything starts to make me sick.  I’ve actually had my share fair of stomach troubles from ulcers and stomach bugs carried back from studying in M exico.  A lot of it solved itself by cleaning up my diet.  But my diet hasn’t been the greatest lately.  In scope of the rest of America, its great but I try to c ompare myself only to the standard I set for myself.  And in that scope it was awful.  So I decided to do a cleanse. I actually did a colonic first to jump start everything.  It was a first and an interesting first at that.  I would actually recommend it to anyone but it’s an experience.  I would not recommend training after wards where we worked body shots.  Admittedly I know very little about clea...

sports·man·ship noun : conduct (as fairness, respect for one's opponent, and graciousness in winning or losing) becoming to one participating in a sport And its one of my pet peves.  I see it all the time but it still grates on me.  It reflects poorly on you, your school and even worse upon our sport.  I can't say I am above it but I try very hard.  Its also really easy to stoop down to someone else's level instead of rise above it.  I had my first mma fight in April.  Probably one of the best experiences of my life, despite loosing. Though it was slightly diminished by my opponent.  She failed to make weight by 7lbs.  I didnt care, I wanted to fight.  We went 3 full rounds.  Disappointing to loose but satisfied for a first fight.  Then the trash talk began.  There was a camera person following her into the locker room, where she proceeded to talk trash about our school, that we misrepresented me ...

I'm home in New Mexico visiting my family for the holidays.  I come home because I love and miss my family and friends here.  Otherwise, I'd probably never come back here.  It holds no special place in my heart.  Its a strange place.  I lived here for most of my life, we moved to NM when I was 6 and I left when I was 23.  There are strange neighborhoods and those that are a bit dangerous, its just part of living here. When we first moved here, getting used to the spicy food was an adjustment.  We came from steak and potatoes Montana, and in NM there is this chile (red and green) that they put on everything.  So going out to eat was initially a big challenge for the family.  But my dad had found this hole in the wall by the fairgrounds at Central and Louisiana that a coworker had recommend for fajitas.  Worst case my sister and I could eat a bunch of tortillas.  So off we go on a family dinning experience.  But anyone who knows...

I used to laugh at this friend of mine from training.  I’d text him after training and he would say he’s on the floor.  He’d been there since he got home from training.  I didn’t understand.  And then I found myself on the floor of my room last night and not wanting to get up. I laid down on the floor to play with the cat.  This has become our routine at night.  He’s waiting at the door when I come home, he follows me to my room where I put down my gym bag and then I lay on the floor to play with him.  Usually logic prevails and I get up after about 5 minutes to get in the shower.  ….20 minutes later I was almost asleep on the floor and was finding the floor unusually comfortable…   Obviously Im a bit out of shape.    

Last Saturday I got a bit of stomach bug.  Bit might be an understatement.  I had to pull over twice on the way to my hair appointment to get sick and once in the middle of it.  No I have no explanation for why I was so hell bent on getting my hair cut … So the only thing I could hold down was wh ite rice and ramen.  On a nutritional scale from 1-10, those are a 0.  But they did make me feel better .  This went on for about 4 days .  By day 4, my back was cramping from weakness when I would hold the hair dryer attempting to dry my h air. I had been feeding my muscles nothing for 3 days and they were revolting.  I managed to get some food down later that night, but still felt wiped out.  Today is probably the first day , I haven’t felt exhausted.  I joke that I would eat candy and drink coke ’ s all day if you let me, but I wouldn’t .  I don’t know how people eat crap...

Yesterday my schedule was different and it threw my eating off a bit in the am.  By afternoon it became  a downward spiral. And then I hit the gym... Deadlifts were the prescribed strength training from my coach.  And I was regretting my decision of gummy bears and popcorn for my snack by second set.  I record all my workouts in this great little book that I used to loath that Jeremy makes us use.  Now its like a version of crack.  I look back and compare my workouts and how I'm improving.  My last DL was a 6x3 this was a 5x6.  Different but I should still have comparable ranges.   Not post gummy bears.  My final set was 245 and it was hell.  I had a full week of rest, that should have been nothing.  I felt nothing in my legs.  Not even burn.  They just felt nothing.  And that is why I manage my diet.  Because I can feel it in my workout.  I can tell it gives me the energy to do a workout...

I will freely admit I'm an introvert. I like my time to myself. Actually I need it. All day at work I have to step outside of my introvert comfort zone box. At the gym it's split. I can be in my own little bubble but I love those people so I also enjoy talking to them. But by the time it hits Saturday afternoon my extrovert meter is on empty and I become a hermit in my apartment. Except not lately. Lately I can't spend enough time around 4 or 5 friends. Normally I won't give anyone time on Sundays because its my time. Unless its one of those friends. And then it's disappointing when I have to leave them. And we are already making plans for the next time we see each other. They are those rare people that you can just talk to. Nothing is forced. And if there is a pause its ok. They are the friends I see myself having for a very long time. They are the people that make life better.

It's what one of my coaches asks. After practice. After competing. Anytime. I try and use that constructively, though I am much better at being deconstructive. 4 fights and 3 ish training cycles I am learning a lot about me as a competitor. My training is leaps and bounds better. Conditioning is on point. It's my head that I struggle with every cycle. You can know something means a lot to you. You arrange your whole life around it. But at the same time, you don't always realize how important it is to you. Until you get emotional about it. And apparently that's going to happen once a training cycle for me. Anyone that knows me would say I'm not very emotional. Probably just the opposite. But apparently once a training cycle I will reach my break point, which apparently includes crying. And then I go to bed at like 9, sleep 10 hours and I'm fine. Yes, I know it's a little over training too. But the first time it happened, it wrecked me. It was so close to ...

I have always slept easy, as long as its not hot. I hit the pillow and am out in 2 minutes. I read an article a while back about an elite marathoner who was struggling with her training because her insomnia affected her sleep. I felt fortunate to not have that problem. Until about a year and a half ago. I took on some personal endeavors and had trouble sleeping. That passed. Then a bad break up. That passed. And now I'm exhausted and can't sleep. There are some things going on at work that I believe are impacting this. I just didn't realize how bad it had gotten until last week. 15 minutes ago I was teary-eyed I was so sleepy, laying on the couch watching tv. Wash my face brush my teeth and I'm wide awake at 1am. And I'm rethinking everything. Usually fighting or training. I know. Worst calming activity ever. But it's running through my mind, keeping me up. And the frustrating part is, I see it impact my training. It affects how tired I get, how much I ...

What causes some to have unmatched success and others to fade into nothing?  Or others to bounce back from what appears insurmountable failure? Its something I have thought a lot about.  And as any good business person, have read a fair amount about.  I thought I understood this concept of success. And then fighting came into my life.  And success took on a whole new meeting.  I didn't have to just be stronger, I had to be physically better.  I had to be able control my emotions, channel them into something that I wanted.  When I wanted them.  Something I had never experienced before.  I never competed in sports growing up, something I now regret. I have spent a great deal of time talking with others, especially my coaches on this.  Its a learning curve.  Just as my body went through it and now handles the training with ease, my mind needs to catch up.  Im reading the book "The Art of Learning" by Josh Waitzkin.  An ...

The MCM as it is so often referred holds a special place in my life.  It was my first marathon.  I did it with my sister.  I ran on a stress fracture that turned into a broken tibia or your shin bone....yes I have always been this stubborn.  And the training schedule held my life together when I was about to fall apart.  I was getting divorced.  I don't deal with emotions very well and definitely not my own.  But the training schedule and plan gave me something to do, even when all I wanted was to sit home and feel sorry for myself.  The best part was my girl friend Jennifer met me in Crystal City at about mile 21 to run the end with me.  If it wasn't for her, I know I would have given up.  But she kept me talking and going.  So the year after, I had a dear friend who had turned his life around by picking up running and was running the MCM that year.  I offered to run the last 6 with him.  So my sister and I cheered runner...

So I write about dumb things some times.  But it’s usually something dumb that affects my training.  And this will be no exception.    My sleep. And how much of it I get. It’s probably the thing I struggle with the most in my training.  I know how important it is.  I can feel how important it is.  I plan my day around getting at least 7 hours each night…don’t judge it’s the best I can do with everything Im trying to cram in.  If I don’t get enough sleep, my training is worthless.  Im there but mentally, I never showed up.  Food I can kinda mess up.  Or I can at least mildly recover from.  If I miss sleep, there is only one option.  So in addition to having limited time for sleeping, I get really warm when I sleep.  My grandmother (or Nanny as I refer to her) has told me that you could put your hands over me when I was little and feel the heat radiating off of me.  Not much has changed.  E...

I think I know best. And I have a really hard time hearing otherwise.  But there is a very unique feeling I have towards my coaches.  I trust them.  Inherently.  Its part of them being coaches, its why I could no longer work with my last coach .  Its a strange thing, I believe without hesitation the things they tell me.  If they told me that I could pull off a double leg on the biggest guy, Id probably nod and go.  I remember during my fight, there was one thing I was going for the whole time, it was part of the original game plan.  And I never felt I could pull it off but I heard my coach calling for it, so I did it.  Not because I thought it would land but because I believed he knew better than me.  The knee to the face landed flush, beautiful. The last couple days I was starting to doubt something, and then after talking with my coach I dropped that negative thought.  Because I trusted in what he told me.    

Some times I think one of the things I love about my training is the structure it brings to my life. It tells me when to be at work, when to eat, when to sleep.  My whole life is directed by it.  It gives the structure that I need.  But I'm an adult right, I can still be responsible to get enough sleep, eat right, etc.  Apparently not.  This was my rest week post fight.  My chance to catch up with friends, not be so structured and not live by my training schedule.  Monday I went in to the gym to get a little gi practice in, since I was doing Copa I figured I should try it out.  The next couple of nights were a combination of going out or just being too full of energy to sleep.  So by Friday night, I was feeling run down...on a rest week.  I don't wear my self out training 15-20 hours a week, nope I do it when I supposed to be resting.  I took this picture of my room last night because its the epitome of my rest week...chaos C...

My best friend and I have these long conversations about chemical attraction.  Of course he has a ridiculous amount of information about all the things that can change in a female and alter this….all derived from an ex-gf that kinda went crazy after changing her birth control.  His theory is that all the chemicals in the products we use in and on our body, alter a person’s body chemistry.  I have to admit I kind of thought he was full of crap.  But on his suggestion, I switched to a more natural body wash that isn’t scented and put my perfume on my clothes, not my body.  The perfume was no big deal but the body wash is.  I train a lot.  I get other people sweat on me.  I get rolled into and squished into the mat.  And I sweat like a fat person.  So getting clean and getting rid of germies is a big deal.  So I apprehensively switched my body wash.  Easy part was the perfume.  I still feel clean ...

Wow is about all I can say.  I won my fight last night and got fight of the night.  I executed my game plan exactly as we had planned.  I fought the fight I wanted to and couldn't be happier.  Though Im sure once I watch tape, Ill pick it apart and have things to change.  Thats where you grow and get better.  I trusted in my coaches, absorbed everything they said and it paid off.  Between them and my teammates, they have helped me grow unbelievably since my fight in April.  I dont think I have ever worked as hard as I did the last 7 weeks.  I love fighting.  I loved it more last night.  It brings a balance to my life that I can't replace.  It makes anything that happens in my day seem minor and tolerable.  It provides the structure that I need.  My food, my sleep, my job all are structured to allow me to do it.  It may seem extreme but that just me, 120% all the time.  The cycle is the most intense thin...

Dieting.  It’s this crazy thing we are obsessed with.  I watch in stupefied fascination at what the people around me do.  But I’ve been there and done it.  I’ve cut my calories back to retarted levels.  Measuring and counting.  Skipped meals.  Candy bar for lunch.  Carb loaded.  Tried it all.  But as I have learned more about my body and my training has become the center of my life, I have developed an obsession with nutrition.  Minus my sugar addiction (which has been under control the last few weeks) I eat pretty well.  My dad tells this funny story that as a little kid I wouldn’t eat McDonalds.  He was always torn about this.  He never wanted me to eat McD’s but also wanted me to just stop being so stubborn and eat something while we were out and away from the house.  Fortunately for him I never relented on either, I still don’t eat McD’s and I am probably more stubborn than ever.  My p...

Have you ever seen a kid throwing a fit screaming and making a scene in the middle of the store when their parent told them “no” about something? That's what goes on in my head when I want sweets or a coke. My inner two year old starts screaming and jumping up and down yelling "I want it! I need it! I have to have it!” And I give in.  I do want it.  I think I need it.  And when Im having a shitty moment, it does make me feel better.  I find solace in my food.  I feel like I should be about 300 lbs to be able to say that.    Until I feel the remorse for eating it.  And then I say Im not doing that again.  But I do.  Often.  And it’s a constant struggle I go through.    And then I saw something a few days ago as I was scrolling Facebook from one of the many fitness things I follow.  It said to tell yourself “I don’t eat that.”  I scrolled fast because I ...

So these posts are usually about me.  Or about a way that someone is annoying me.  But this weekend I was inspired by my dear friend Nathalie Behn.  We have known each other for almost 3 years.  We met when we worked together at BAE.  I was really into Krav Maga and would come in all bruised up and hurt.  She would tell me I was crazy and to take up golf. She would come in every day eating a Kit Kat and drinking a sugar free red bull.  Then about a year ago, she decided she was going to start doing these Tough Mudder and Civilian Military Combine.  I like my training and my sport but these races are something I have no desire to do.  It used to be me that would say "I cant got out I have training," then it was her.  She was doing all this training, stopped eating chocolate and Nutella.  Finally she had a race close, the Spartan Race .  Minor logistics snare with traffic so I didn't see her start but was there to watch and che...

So I had a nice relaxing vacation last week. I kept aware of what was going on at work but not on top of it. I came in on Friday afternoon to catch up with my boss and to have a little handoff since he was out this week. Though the reality is, there is just no way to handoff. My boss and I divide an conquer really well (theoretically thats what a PM and their deputy do), but it means there are things I just don't have any idea about and same goes for him. But when one of us is gone, it's tough because you hit the ground running to cover. On par with normal, that's how this week has been. I fortunately have an amazingly bright team that works for me, that covers me.  I had been prepping for an extremely high level demo of our capabilities for the majority of my Monday morning, when I received notice that one of my very technical managers whom I rely on heavily had given his two weeks notice. One hour later, another key manager told me he didn't think he could do the jo...

I love salty foods.  But for some reason Im not that into potato chips.  As I picked out the veggies for our box, I initially removed the Kale.  I had it stripped down to mostly mushrooms, heirloom tomatoes, zucchini and green beans.  I usually leave the creativity up to Jenn.  But she is in Cali with Dave.  So I had to be brave and I added it to the box.  Its not that interesting but is pretty good for you . Google away and pretty much everyone says add a little olive oil, garlic and salt.  Then bake until crispy.  It was pretty simple.  I might have got a little carried away with tearing it into small pieces but there are worse things.  The most annoying part was spreading it out evenly on the baking sheet.  I had three batches so it should last us most of the week.  Despite being super tasty, Kale is very full of fiber and should be spread out over the course of the week.  Lesson learned.

So Im stubborn to the point of stupidity.  And then I usually even pass that.  I was deciding what to get in the veggie box this week and I decided why not go with tons of zucchini.  I fell back to the house favorite of using the zucchini as spaghetti .  But I have this problem when I cook, it tastes great but looks awful.  Especially with this stupid recipe.  So I changed the setting on my handy mandoline to the french fry size.  I also have this conundrum of how to mix it in my frying pan because its usually over flowing until it cooks down.  So this time as I sliced up the zucchini I put them in a pot and then added the sausage mixture over that.  I cooked the sausage with the right leeks, onions and coconut oil, remove the onions and leeks then added the tomatoes, garlic and salt to simmer while I sliced up zucchini. Once the zucchini was mixed and cooked down a bit, it went back in the frying pan.  Yes I create way too many dirty di...

Airplane travel is just another day for me.  With the majority of my family in New Mexico and Montana, I spend a fair amount of time traveling.  I also had the "opportunity" to travel a lot for work.  I know everything I want and need to make my trips comfortable.  And I also realize there is no point in flipping out and yelling at someone.  So when I arrived at DCA to find a very long line and I only had 1.5 hours until my flight, I waited patiently.  It was a combination of computers being down and apparently people missing flights or something.  Something that required you to talk to a person.  At 6:15 I was pulled out of line and to the next kiosk to check in.  Off to security I went where I was also plucked because of my 7 am flight. So Ill admit to kind of being an asshole.  I knew my flight was already delayed by 40 minutes but I was starving and extremely uncomfortable from the surgery I had a week ago.  All I wanted to do w...

So in my fantasy land Im an amazing cook.  I create things spontaneously with whats in the fridge and it turns out fantastic.  In reality, I pilfer and steal recipes.  I mildly modify to suit my preferences.  Tonight was one of those mild modifications.  Our veggie box had lots of my second favorite veggie, zucchini.  I had some left over julienned zucchini from the last time I made my favorite zucchini recipe . So I figured Id make it again.  Every time I have made it, I modify it just a bit.  First time I stuck to the recipe.  Second time I ditched the red pepper and swapped the coconut cream for heavy cream...Im just not that Paleo.  This time I used purely what I had on hand and came up with the list below: 1.25 lbs sweet Italian pork sausage, diced (I popped it in the freezer for about 20 minutes to make it easier to cut) 2 small red onions 1/2 sweet yellow onion 1 container of baby portabella mushrooms 5 zucchini squash, sliced wit...

Eggs.  They are really good for you.  And I actually really like eating them. But oh about 14 years ago we had a tragic run that resulted in the most awful case of food poison I have ever been through.  It ruined an entire 4 day Thanksgiving holiday and scared me for the next 12.5 years.  I started eating eggs almost because I had to, I was cutting weight for a fight with my at the time boyfriend and decided I couldnt be that much of an asshole.  I started with egg whites and have pretty much stayed there until last December when I had this adventure with my dear friends.  I have loved the steak and eggs there ever since.  I actually joked to my best friend when we left there the other day that I would marry the man that cooked me steak and eggs like that at home.  Food does make me do crazy things.  I get on food kicks and there is something I cant get enough of. For the past couple months it was salami.  It was like the most wonderful...

There are times when you are expected to be nervous. But those times you know what to do with the nerves, where they come from, what will make them subside. Then there are times when your nerves get the best of you and you can't explain why. It's a somewhat natural reaction but your reaction becomes unnatural, unexplainable. And your not sure what causes it so you don't know how to handle it. Things are black and white to me, ask any one I work with. Not knowing the cause of a feelings is unfamiliar territory. I cant wrap my head around it and solve it, which is what I do with everything. So I do the only thing I can do. You take a deep breath and hold on to what you know.

So lasagna is like that rare homemade treat that I just love but no one ever makes me, I now know why...they are a pain in the ass.  Fantastic none the less.  Since I began researching Paleo recipes I had noticed the use of zucchini in place of pasta, notably in lasagna.  I actually love zucchini, probably my fav veggie other tomatoes.  So I had been dying to make one.  Low and behold, guess what arrives in our veggie box.  4 zucchini.  Opportunity.  Minor problem.  Ive never made a lasagna in my life.  Thank goodness for Google.  I knew the things I liked in my lasagna, some things I wanted to try.  So I searched away and the best recipe I found was this one by The Pioneer Woman .  I had found much fancier ones but thats not really what I was looking for.  And all the paleo ones take out cheese.  Lets be honest, your waisting your time with a lasagna that doesn't have cheese.  Life just isn't worth living w...

Anyone that knows me, would tell you, the thing that gets in my way is my own head. My own fear holds me back.  Its not my lack of skill of my inability, its that I doubt both of those.  Ive been told it a few times.  But it never set in until today.  I had a hard session of sparring a few weeks back.  I won't lie, it hurt.  And I hurt for a while after wards.  And then it held me back.  But there was no stopping today.  I had run out of reasons not to come to practice.  So I came.  And sparred. And then the round I was afraid of happened.  Coach Ric.  I got hit, it wasn't that bad...my own head had made it worse than it was.  I could take a whole lot more than I had thought.  I was holding my self back.

It's probably the hardest part of my job. Not because I don't like it or it's a pain, but because it's that fine art form of giving someone enough rope but not enough to hang themselves. And because I'm a demanding perfectionist but that's beside the point. The thing is, I've made it to this point in my career because I had some amazing mentors, some I even still call friends. People that had patience with me as I fumbled through learning new technologies, spoke my mind a little too often and learned who I was along the way. They guided me about what to think about, how to approach projects and people, traps I'd fall into, traps I'd set for others and how to explain things I found very simple but not everyone did. I'm direct, somedays to a fault. Which is my biggest obstacle when I mentor someone. Because the first words out of my mouth are usually "You fucked up now go fix it." But if I had heard that all the times I deserved it, I...

I'm generally quick to make decisions. Makes me really effective at my job. Case in point, buying a motorcycle and not knowing how to ride it or actually have ever seen the bike. I got an idea in my head last week after the reality of a few bad decisions came to play out. Actually, the famous roomie put the idea in my head. But I mulled it over for the better part of a week, eternity in my decision making realm. I made a list, as generally instructed by my dad, to consider my options. When I looked at the pro's it looks pretty good, solves the mess I've gotten myself into. Then I looked at the con's. It's going to be tough but there wasn't one thing on the list that logic didn't have an answer for or that wasn't trumped by the pro list. And today I made up my mind. Slightly aided by my good friend, probably the male version of myself, saying he'd do it with me. Jumping off a cliff is slightly less scary when someone goes with you. Not to worry...

So Saturdays are my days.  I just eat, train and sleep.  Its my day and work doesn't come in to the picture. On Saturdays I head out to Loudon to train at our other gym.  It gives me a chance to get a third MMA class in and work with Iman, as well as other people but nothing beats working with Iman.  I also get to hit the advanced Muay Thai class with Coach Ric.  When I first went out there, Coach Scott gave me a heads up.  Though nothing he could have said would have prepared me for what I walked into.  Its one of the toughest, grittiest 1.5 hours and I love it.  In a weird way that you can only love hard training and a tough coach. I adore each of my coaches for different reasons but he has a coaching style that works well with my personality.  So last Saturday was a hard sparring session.  And there was only 3 of in class, which meant we each got a round with Ric.  I got heads up about what was about to happen but words don't pre...

9 years ago this month I moved to DC for a job with Boeing. I loved it and DC from the moment I got here. A bad manager and a few life changes later and I left 5 years later. It was a hard choice but once I got there, nothing could have changed my mind. I spoke to several VPs, a few higher ups, my mentor but there was nothing they could say to change my mind. My career has progressed pretty well since then. And today I found myself scrambling to see what I could do to keep a really good employee. Making that phone call, asking what could be done but knowing there was nothing I could say. I'd been there. I'd heard his words come straight from my mouth and knew how solidified the position was. I had noticed a month or so back when I was the one that stepped in and got a situation resolved that the people under me were floundering in. But it's official now, I'm no longer the young one in the office. Somehow I became the responsible one. I'm now that one the college hir...

I manage a team of about 80 people that is a mix of subcontractors and my own company. A small team but it has the same problems I have faced every where else. You always have one who gets hired and just doesn't have the skill set. So this person has been counseled and corrected numerous times. But to accommodate a seating issue she had to swap seats with another employee and it placed her closer to her boss. Somehow all the counseling didn't set in but moving her to outside her bosses door did. I'll never understand people. How can a person be so unaware? Sometimes I think you have to literally smack someone upside the head for things to sit in. I love my job but sometimes the people test that.

So my boss is out of pocket for 7 business days but its really 11.  Im counting the weekends since we are 24x7 and I received my first 1 am phone call about work on Friday night.  And Im in charge.  Its really not that bad.  It is REALLY busy but thats how I like things.  Its actually when I work best.  But Im 2/4 days in and I'm exhausted with dealing with the people.  Im an introvert by nature.  I know it doesn't work for my job so at work I step out of my box.  There are times in the day where I can retreat and not have to deal with people.  Not this week.  Its a non stop revolving door in my office. I actually had about 30 minutes where no one came into my office this afternoon and I got up and walked out to make sure everything was ok.  It would be one thing if it was people with real problems and about 5% are.  But the other 95% are capable adults being incapable of handling their own problems.  And they want me...

It's our measuring stick for progress. It makes my stomach sink every time I hear it. It's 17 minutes of hell. But it's our measuring stick. And so we did it on Saturday. And it sucked. And my score was 4 points worse than last time. I expected, knew, my score was going to be worse. I had an injection in a tendon in my shoulder to accelerate the heeling, hence swelling and inflammation. I feel stronger but my score doesnt show that at all. The only place it showed was box jumps but if you had seen my box jumps before there was no where to go but up. Poor Don and all his patience as I flounder through them. Oddly I rocked out more each round than I did in the one before. Everything else sucked. But that's a turning point for this week and doing better. It's going to be a rough one. My boss is out, I'm in charge, scary thought I know. My goal for this week is at least 6 hours of sleep each night (7 is ideal but let's be realistic), to get up when the alarm goe...

So this is kind of a gripe but I'm hoping someone can explain. So at MMA fights the fans always get antsy when it goes to the ground. They boo (which I can't stand) or constantly yell "stand them up" (fight pet peeve #2). The fans go bananas when the guys just stand there and bang it out. But that's not MMA. So I don't understand why Muay Thai isn't more popular. I'm still learning about Muay Thai but it seems to have a really large component to staying in the pocket and banging it out. Theoretically it should be more popular the MMA. But it's not. Is it the UFC marketing machine? Is there something of disdain about MT? I hardly believe that's even possible for fight fans. If we don't get offended by condom depot or gun store ads, what's really going to upset us? Surely not a Diaz flipping someone off for the umpteenth time. What has stifled MT's growth and rocketed MMA?

So in this scope of person victories, today was actually kind of big.  This is going to seem irrelevant to everyone else but I ate broccoli for the first time in about 4 weeks.  It didn’t make me gag but it wasn’t the worst thing that happened to me.  A little salt (or a lot) and General Tso’s sauce makes a huge difference.  And I rode my motorcycle to work.  Again big deal for me.  It still scares the shit out of me.  I don’t think I ever made it over 60 but considering this is only my 3 rd time riding it, I kind of feel a minor victory.  After I got here, I thought “who do I know that could ride my bike home and I could take their car?”  I love it at times and then there is this reality of if I wreck, it’s gonna be mess.  I’m getting more comfortable but it’s still not always fun.  Is what it is and now I have to get home, or to practice and then home.    ...

So most of the music I like doesn’t play at large venues, probably better for me because people get on my nerves most days.  But a few weeks back I was asked if I wanted to go to RHCP concert.  Honestly, if it had been anyone else I would have said no but it was two of my best friends and probably one of my favorite couples to be around.  They are that relationship you can only hope to have, that just seems to work easily.  They have fun with each other.  I also have a ton of fun around them.  They have been my biggest advocate as I went through some shit in the last year, being the logic I sometimes didn’t have and also hugely support my fighting.  Who would have known that me falling asleep on their couch during fights would lead to this friendship?  I could never quite figure out what made their relationship work so well and then we got in a conversation about double lives and being honest in your relationships, especially s...

Do you ever see something and think “That’s a terrible idea”?  Apparently that’s what I’m magnetically drawn to.  Anything that’s bad for me.  If it’s a dumb idea I’ve probably tried it.  Maybe except for stealing cars, haven’t gone there.  But if I keeping driving Mike’s M5, it won’t be long.  Sometimes I know it’s dumb and decide f***-it and do it anyhow.  Other times, most times, there are red flags everywhere.  And I dismiss them.  Rationalize them.  Ignore all logic I see written everywhere.  Believe the things I hear instead of that gut feeling. Ignore that feeling that is right almost always.  But only in my personal life.  At work, I’ve followed my gut more times than what people told me to do.  Its worked out well.  Guided me through breaks, different paths and now down the path I’m pursuing.  Strange thing t...

So Im still processing yesterday and not ready to write about it.  What I am ready to write about is a challenge I have taken on.  Sometimes I need a little prodding.  Probably anyone that is reading this would never believe that.  But Im my own worst critic.  I saw this come across my FB timeline but didn't even consider it, and then a good friend told me I should.  So naturally I signed up.  Its a 9 week challenge to basically rep Under Armour  in a competition to redefine the female athlete.  They are calling it "Whats Beautiful" .  I actually tried getting a job with UA at one point, its probably the single company I admire and want to be a part of most.  You post a goal and perform a series of challenges towards that goal.  The challenges are listed below.  Some are individual, some involve others.  Im kind of nervous to undertake this.  Not really sure why.  I guess the fear of failure in putting mysel...